Carrot Cake Murder

carrotcakemurder

Carrot Cake Murder (Hannah Swenson Mystery #10) by Joanne Fluke

I did not like this book.

tumblr_ng4wawgxLN1s2wio8o1_500

I thought the story wasn’t that good and very under developed. And that the author went for an easy ending, instead of creating something that made sense and was actually mysterious.

yuck_pirates_of_the_caribbean

This was extremely lackluster and boring.

im_bored_himym

But review I must.

lets-do-this-ucas-gif

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

Plot Synopsis:

So it is summertime and Lisa and Herb are having a big family reunion, inviting every single relation. It is a huge affair and Hannah, her family, and two boyfriends are also joining the crew.

1920sparty

One person that Herb’s mom Marge’s long-lost brother Gus who took off years ago never to be found, ends up showing up to the party.

coincidencegi

He  said he was just in the area and happened among some flyers and thought he would join the group. He has a a lot of money and fancy suits.

wow

However, at the reunion a lot of old hurts come up. Gus was a master manipulator, a borrower and not returner, and a blackmailer. He has a lot of people that he has upset over the years.

Not-Good

He asks Hannah for her special carrot cake as he just loves it, and Hannah gives him a whole one.

eatingcake

The next day no one can find Gus for the group picture, so they of course send Hannah and she finds the dead body.

StarTrekTheOriginalSeriesHesDeadJim

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

So let’s start with what was wrong in this book.

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

A) If It Is Such a Big Party With So Many to Feed, Why Are Hannah & Family & Boyfriends Included?

suspicious Hmm

I know that Hannah and such are great friends of Lisa and Herb, but it seems weird to invite so many non-family members to a family event. I mean it is not just a few people but Hannah, her sister Andrea, her husband Bill, their two children, Bill’s mother, Hannah’s mother Dolores, Hannah’s sister Michelle, Michelle’s boyfriend Lonnie, Hannah’s boyfriend Mike, Hannah’s boyfriend Norman, and Norman’s mom.

What?

Do they really need a dozen more people, at a family only event? No. And Hannah is helping to cook means she should come, yeah her but why are there 11 extra with her? It is just another plot by the author to have Hannah a part of everything that goes on in her town.

seriously

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

B) Gus Just Happened To See the Reunion On A Flyer

Come on, Mack

Why do they have flyers to a family only event that they sent marked mailers to? You are not expecting the whole town to come, why paper the streets?

doesn'tmakesense

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

C) Hannah Goes On A Huge Derail On the Size And Weight Of Hockey Pucks

What?

Sometimes I feel as if Fluke is paid by the word or something. She is constantly derail on the weirdest subjects, weird as in THEY HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH THE PLOT! I’m tired of it, please STOP!!!!

Stop this stupid love triangle!

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

D) Don’t Eat Hannah’s Food, You Will Die

StarTrekTheOriginalSeriesHesDeadJim

I’m pretty sure in every, single book the person dies eating Hannah’s food. All I can think is why hasn’t anyone made the correlation and Hannah have gone out of business already. Eat her signature dish and you might be signing your death warrant.

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

E) Hannah Finds Another Dead Body

phonecall

In almost every book Hannah finds the dead body. It is boring! Come on Fluke, change it up.

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

F) Mike & Hannah Drama Continues

blahblah

In every book Hannah complains about Mike not being a great boyfriend because he won’t let her investigate with him. What do you think Hannah, that any cop would love to have an amateur bungling things and getting evidence illegally. Listen up Hannah, why don’t you become a real cop or private investigator, and then Mike will leave you alone.

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

G) Rocky Road S’Mores?

whatsthatsupposedtomean

Lisa makes a bar cookie she calls Rocky Road Bar Cookies, after the Rocky Road Ice-Cream.  She puts nuts, marshmallows, chocolate, etc.; the same ingredients in the ice-cream. Hannah tries it and says that it tastes like S’mores

What?

What kinda S’mores are you making Hannah? They don’t have nuts. And they have graham crackers in it instead.

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

H) I Have Never Had A S’More Before

What'sHappening?BigBangTheory

Lisa tells Hannah she has never had a S’more before which makes no sense. Every store that sells food sells the fixing for s’mores. Hershey’s advertises it on TV as soon as we hit May, so does Honey Maid, etc. I cannot believe she has never tried a S’more “because she didn’t learn in girl scouts”. Get real.

seriously

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

I) Red Velvet Cookies Cure Alzheimer’s

Come on, Mack

As someone who has multiple family members who suffer from the disease, words cannot describe how deeply hurt and offended I am at you even suggesting that, whether it is in jest or not.

jerk-gif

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

J) Randomness That DOES NOT ADD TO THE STORY!

Ijustwantittostop

We spend too much time on random acronyms to remember Native American tribes, the Great Lakes, colors of the rainbow. Just stop!

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

K) Mexican Hotdish Mexican Not Dish

no-way-gif-gifs

Your Mexican Hotdish isn’t even Mexican. Jack cheese? White rice? Fritos corn chips? Offensive to the Max! If anything it is Tex-Mex. Get it right.

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

L) Don’t These People Have Jobs?

idon'tknowwhatI'mdoing

Man Hannah and Norman spend so much time NOT working I wonder how they can provide for themselves.  I mean Norman just decides to fly to Atlantic City, doesn’t he need to work? Doesn’t Hannah? I mean it is one thing to work investigating around work, but these guys just totally disregard it.

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

M) Exposition, Exposition, Exposition to Make the End Work

In the last 42 pages we get this big exposition rush about one of Lisa’s relations who is bad at the stock market and wasted away the money, mean to his wife, mad that Gus won’t give the money he borrowed from his wife back, blah, blah, blah. Listen Fluke, you do this a lot and it is horrible. I don’t know if you can’t decide on a killer or feel you need a “twist” for the reader but it is really bad, really bad.

Not-Good

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

N) If He is So Horrible Why Are You Still Married?

What?

So Peggy is the wife of the murderer and the deliverer of the exposition about how Mac is totally the murderer. You go on about how horrible and threatening he is, why are you still married? Why don;t you leave.

And if you love him as much as you say and act, why are you so willing to give him up to the police. It just didn’t make any sense and felt like Fluke was rushed and just did the ending the night before it was due to print.

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

O) Ross is Back

2013-11-27-bradpitt friends ugh slap face stupid

This bland saltine of a man is back? Seriously? Come on, just stop. Isn’t it enough you have two guys fighting over Hannah, do we have to include another guy who is blander than a heart patient’s diet?

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

Thoughts After Reading:

Hated it. Two out of Five stars.

bannerbooks-border-black-and-white

For more Hannah Swenson Mysteries, go to Candy Cane Murder

For more reviews, go to Grave Peril

 

Advertisements

2 thoughts on “Carrot Cake Murder

  1. OnlyAverageMom says:

    Can I add, that everything she wrote about Girl Scouts is wrong?
    Tracy would be a Daisy, not a Brownie (and in the US, they are not called Brownie Scouts). All levels of Scouts are Girl Scouts. There is no special exception made for girls to earn badges above their current programming. No one from nationals goes to a meeting to give out badges. Leaders give them at ceremonies, or after completion.
    As someone who has volunteered with scouts for 8 years, it’s incredibly frustrating to see that Fluke did not do her homework here.
    Maybe I need to own a bakery so I can not work as much as Hannah does and still pay my bills.
    I was also surprised at how little anyone in the book knows about technology. Where do these people live?

    Liked by 1 person

    • I know. It’s almost as if they are living in the ’80s or ’90s versus today. Thank you for sharing that about Girl Scouts. I thought it wasn’t right, but I don’t know enough about it (my troop didn’t do much and disbanded) to comment. I think you are right on about the bakery. I don’t understand how she or Norman are able to pay for anything, they always seem to be shrugging their duties off on others and not working.

      Like

Leave Your Thoughts

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s